Posted by Connie Nankya
“Why should a girl exist without a man today? I mean, if you want him, you can get him regardless of whether he is interested in you or not. Trust me, there are certain ways to make him want you, just visit a recommended native doctor and you can have it done without a hassle,” said Lorna (not real names), a single mother of one child.
The above statement might startle you but there are many women out there who are turning to witch doctors to get their way in relationships. Winfred Kabanda a.k.a Ssenga Smart, a traditional counsellor working down town, confirms that it is a reality. According to her and many other women out there, women use witchcraft popularly known as juju in their relationships for the following reasons.
To get a man: Lorna above is an example. According to her, being a single mother at the age of 29 was never a childhood dream hence at a certain point she had to be coerced into using witchcraft to get the man that she thought suited her.
“After having my child, things did not work out with my ex and we broke up. I dated for years without much success. My mother who is my number one confidant told me that if I ever found a good man, I let her know and the rest would be history. I finally found him, a handsome divorcee, well established and rich, I can say. I was given some things, I cannot quite explain them, to shower with and other stuff to do. Suddenly he is all over me and is talking marriage. I cannot be any happier,” she narrates with excitement. Women like Lorna feel lonely and desperate at a certain time in their lives. When all their peers are settling down and starting families and they aren’t, they may panic and then they resort to witchcraft to get them partners.
To get a man: Lorna above is an example. According to her, being a single mother at the age of 29 was never a childhood dream hence at a certain point she had to be coerced into using witchcraft to get the man that she thought suited her.
“After having my child, things did not work out with my ex and we broke up. I dated for years without much success. My mother who is my number one confidant told me that if I ever found a good man, I let her know and the rest would be history. I finally found him, a handsome divorcee, well established and rich, I can say. I was given some things, I cannot quite explain them, to shower with and other stuff to do. Suddenly he is all over me and is talking marriage. I cannot be any happier,” she narrates with excitement. Women like Lorna feel lonely and desperate at a certain time in their lives. When all their peers are settling down and starting families and they aren’t, they may panic and then they resort to witchcraft to get them partners.
To make a man obedient: According to Ssenga Smart, women want their spouses to love and listen to them all the time without much fuss. But for some women, if their husband is always disrespecting her and not doing things the way she would like it, she turns to juju.
“Men sometimes terrorise women. He comes back home late, so drunk and smelling ladies’ perfume. He does not value her opinions and treats her like she is not important yet the woman loves him a lot. So to get her way, she could end up using witchcraft to get him to listen to her.”
To stop him from cheating: Ssenga Smart says that cheating in a relationship is never welcome. For this reason, women engage in witchcraft just to ensure that their spouse does not sleep or fancy any other woman other than herself.
“This could entail her using certain herbs to wash her private parts such that when they make love, he enjoys it way too much and cannot get the guts to sleep with another lady or when he tries to cheat, cannot get an erection,” she says.
Nangonzi (not real names) confirms that she has tamed her man to be sleep with her and nobody else.
“This could entail her using certain herbs to wash her private parts such that when they make love, he enjoys it way too much and cannot get the guts to sleep with another lady or when he tries to cheat, cannot get an erection,” she says.
Nangonzi (not real names) confirms that she has tamed her man to be sleep with her and nobody else.
“I am married. I hate the thought of him cheating on me. He used to do it initially until a friend advised me to visit a native doctor, which I did. My husband has now confessed that he is not able to have an erection when he is with another lady, and even though I cannot come clean over what I did, I feel happy, satisfied that it is me alone that he can have sex with,” she adds.
To make him commit to marriage:
“Women get insecure sometimes. She has dated this man for a very long time but he does not want to commit to marriage. And as if that is not enough, there are more fish in the sea than she can ever envision. Out of desperation, she will use witchcraft to get him to suddenly be interested in settling down and therefore speed up their engagement process. This is very common today,” explains Ssenga Smart.
“Women get insecure sometimes. She has dated this man for a very long time but he does not want to commit to marriage. And as if that is not enough, there are more fish in the sea than she can ever envision. Out of desperation, she will use witchcraft to get him to suddenly be interested in settling down and therefore speed up their engagement process. This is very common today,” explains Ssenga Smart.
To own him: “He was married. We had had a relationship going on for a while but each time he went back to his wife, I felt so bad. And as if that was not enough, he never wanted me to see anyone else. There I was, 27 years, no reasonable spouse to walk me down the aisle and my biological clock was ticking. After we decided to have a baby, he would not spend much time with me. I needed my child to grow with the father around. I had to do something. I visited a witch doctor who advised me on what and what not to do. Eventually he left his wife, introduced and settled with me. To date, he has never gone back but of course, he spends time with his children but not the wife. Sometimes, I hate what I did but I had to anyway,” says Pamela (not real names).
These are some of the reasons women will visit the witchdoctor. And it is not just the village and uneducated woman who dabble in this. The so called corporate and even Christian women have been known to seek change in their relationships using juju. The fact that it is illegal, dangerous and sometimes fatal does not stop them from using it.
What they do not realise is that when these men change and start doing what the women desire, it is not out of free will. And should that “curse” be broken, the partner might go back to doing the bad things he was doing or even get worse. It would be better for women to seek more peaceable ways to get their partners to change rather than going behind their backs using such dangerous methods.
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